Beloved Blog

Bridal Fast - Day 16 (March 5)

2010-03-08T20:57:00.000-08:00

Friday, we sent our daughter to the children's ministry. We were left with a difficulty decision. The decision to go into the prayer meeting or go to a prayer house to pray by ourselves. What came to my mind was the picture of past prayer meeting: few people chat away for half hour and pray for each other for a little while. I often wonder, how come a church of this size only have few people to pray. There are too many prayless churches. We are so good at doing ministry, than depend on Him for a ministry that is compelled by love.

I had an issue with this kind of prayer meeting. However, I feel that nothing can be done to change. We paced back and forth, stayed in our car, just prayed in the spirit. Holy Spirit convicted my pride, and lack of love for my fellow Christians. We decided to walk into the prayer meeting after 15 minutes in the car.

Today, surprisingly, there are 5 couples there. A brother who has heart for the church revival led the prayer. He read something about the characteristic of revived church. Then he led us to a ACTS (Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, and Supplication) prayer. Everyone opened their mouth to praise God, everyone confessed their sins in front of everyone, everyone has thanked God, the church, family,... of course, there are many supplications, especially on church revival. This is by far the best prayer meeting that I have ever attended in this church. Praise God for His amazing work. Maybe, God has heard our cry for revival and is doing something new here.

Bridal Fast - Day 14 (March 3)

2010-03-04T20:14:00.000-08:00

It must be a divine appointment! Today, A woman of God shared her testimony of miraculous healing with me. How amazing for me to hear His work in an ordinary day like this!

The speaker asked, any testimonies? It has been 5 minutes since someone shared a testimony. We marvelled when people in audience pop up like popcorn. We were so encouraged with the testimonies of Muslin people accepting Jesus through power encounters. This was at Bethel Church, Redding, California. We enjoyed a week 'Heaven invades Earth' last March. God is real and He is supernatural, and He is working in each and everyone of our lives. There is power in testifying His healing, His miracles, and His revelation. Samaritan woman at well shared her testimony of Jesus revealing her dirty laundry led the entire village to Christ. When was last time that you hear the testimonies of what God has done? When was the last time that I shared the testimony with others? It has been a while.

Here is my record of her testimony:

she is a talented pianist. She had three young kids while teaching student piano lessons. Her husband drifted away from the Lord ever since he started to work at airline industry as he was surrounded by nonbelievers. Money became very important. The husband did not allow her to hire babysitters. Each of them slept for about 4 hours a day, since the husband was working two jobs, and she is busy with teaching, playing at different Churches and concert. This way of life lasted for a very long time. Then one day, she passed out and was rushed to the hospital. She had severe colon bleeding. She laid in the hospital for an entire month. All she did was taking IV and sleep. She had no recollection of anything else. Then the doctors sent her home without IV, because there is nothing that they could do. Her weight dropped from 140lb to 90 lb. She was told that she will only live to the afternoon of next day.

About noon of next day, she woke up and managed to look around the house. She saw her dad was praying for her in the corner. She managed to say: why...did...they... send...me...home...no...IV? One word at a time, it took a lot of effort for every word. Then she heard her dad saying: they say that there is nothing that can be done. Her dad has always been honest with her. Her life is played out like movie in her mind. Hearing 'no hope' from the doctors, she remembered that she accepted Jesus's salvation. She said this in her heart: God, if you are real, please save me. Suddenly, she heard this: just like I have provided salvation to you, I have provided healing to you. will you accept it? She sensed God's presence, she knew that everything is going to be OK. She said to the Lord: yes, I accept your healing. She was at peace, even though there is no change in her body for a very long time. She did not die, she lived past the afternoon of next day. She is still living today. The complete healing did not come until 13 years later. During those 13 years, she would shout 'No' to the enemy when she felt 'pain', because she knew that Jesus has provided healing. It was supernatural deposit of faith in her during the 'last minute'. God has done it.

I cried as I listened, Holy Spirit was working in me. I said to Jesus in heart - I accept your healing for my _____.

Bridal Fast - Day 9 (Feb. 26)

2010-03-03T10:21:00.000-08:00

I am several days behind with my blog. Here is my record on last Friday.

What a day I had!

Today, a big deadline hang in front me! I have to finish the tax preparation. My husband did most of it last year. I took over to help him to focus on his work. It requires about 1 week's work, I jammed in in one day! The tasks include sorting documents, calculating numbers, making calls to get missing information, and input to computers. By noon, a huge headache is pounding constantly. I did make to the appointment with the CPA, but I left with CPA office with headache, exthaustion from lack of food, and irritable mood.

Oh, did I learn a good lesson on resting in God today?

I have done everything that I should not do in a day of fast:

1. did not spend quality time waiting on Him.
2. put Tax preparation before everything else.
3. did not pray about the tax prep before the day's work.
4. did not leave sufficient time to prepare for it.

Please do not do what I did. It is inevitable to do 'stressful things' during fast, but I need to do a better job planning and leave ample space to rest in Him.

Bridal Fast - Day 8 (Feb. 25)

2010-02-27T19:10:00.000-08:00

The prayer house is a wonderful place for me to meet with the Lord. I was there for 45 minutes after dropping my daughter off to school. Hello, Jesus! Tears streamed down my face as soon as I said it. He has been waiting.

My only request is to know God's heart for Israel as I prayed. The Lord showed series of movie scenes. At first, He showed me How Jesus was rejected by His own chosen people. He was rejected, mocked, hated, tortured, and put to death. He has loved Israel so much, yet, His love was not received, understood, appreciated, and returned. Then, He showed me that I was rejected, criticized by a person whom I loved dearly few years ago. It was very difficult period of my time. But, what I felt and went through would be so trivial compared to what Jesus had gone through. Then, He reminded me that my own brother has hardened his heart, even though He has been with Him through many life difficulties, and blessed him in many ways. I can not stop crying out to Jesus - save my brother, call him back to you, I will not stop crying out to you until he calls you Abba Father. Last, I kept hearing Rachel's wailing. Does Rachel's weeping represent God's heart for Israel? I did not understand and did some research...

Rachel died of giving birth to her second son (Benjamin) with Jacob. She was buried near Bethlehem (Genesis 35:16-24).

Rachel's weeping was quoted in two places (Jeremiah and Matthew) in the Bible:
Jeremiah 31:15 This is what the LORD says: "A voice is heard in Ramah, mourning and great weeping, Rachel weeping for her children and refusing to be comforted, because her children are no more."

This passage appeared in the middle of God's promise of restoring Israel from captivity.

Matthew 2:16When Herod realized that he had been outwitted by the Magi, he was furious, and he gave orders to kill all the boys in Bethlehem and its vicinity who were two years old and under, in accordance with the time he had learned from the Magi. 17Then what was said through the prophet Jeremiah was fulfilled:
18"A voice is heard in Ramah,
weeping and great mourning,
Rachel weeping for her children
and refusing to be comforted,
because they are no more."[g]

Matthew 2:18 is to fulfill Jeremiah 3:15. The whole city must be filled with weeping and uncontrollable wailing when Herod ordered to kill all the boys under 2 in Bethlehem.

What is my role in restoring Israel? Am I called to weep for Israel?

Bridal Fast - Day 7 (Feb. 24)

2010-02-24T19:53:00.000-08:00

It has been a busy day. I miss the prayer house.

I have a Jewish calender. The coming Sunday February 28 is Purim and it calls people to pray for the children and youth in Israel, that they will receive the spirit of adoption from our Heavenly Father (Rom. 8:15), as Esther did from Mordechai (Esther 2:7).

Purim feast is this coming Sunday (February 28) is the Feast of Purim. Jerusalem, being a 'walled city' celebrates on "Shushan" Purim, the following day. Chronicled in the Book of Esther it relates the story of a time in Persia when the Jews came under an anti-Semitic plot to annihilate them, but Mordecai and Esther were used to bring deliverance. Afterwards an annual celebration was established on "the fourteenth and fifteenth days of the month of Adar, the days on which the Jews had rest from their enemies, the month which was turned from sorrow to joy for them, and from mourning to a holiday; that they should make them days of feasting and joy, of sending presents to one another and gifts to the poor" (Esther 9:21-22). Yet before the time of partying, comes a time of fasting (Esther 9:31). (Prayer Storm by James Goll)

It is time to pray for Israel. Please pray for Israel.

Please pray His guidance to me and revelation of His heart for Israel to His church.

Bridal Fast Day 6 (Feb. 23)

2010-02-24T10:43:00.000-08:00

I have been hearing two words: fearing God, and Humility. I was not sure if God is calling me to resume the study of the ‘Humility’ CD (from the forerunner church) again.

Today, I read Psalm 32-34. King David taught me to pray with
Psalm 32:8 Lord, instruct me and teach me in the way I should go;
counsel me and watch over me.

Psalm 33: 12 Lord, Blessed the nation of America and pray that this nation whose God is the LORD, and you will choose the people of this nation for your inheritance.

There are great benefits in fearing God from Psalm 33-34:
• Deliverance from death,
• Fed in famine,
• Watched over by angels, and
• Lack nothing.

33 18 But the eyes of the LORD are on those who fear him,
on those whose hope is in his unfailing love,
19 to deliver them from death and keep them alive in famine.
34 7 The angel of the LORD encamps around those who fear him,
and he delivers them.
8 Taste and see that the LORD is good;
blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.
9 Fear the LORD, you his saints,
for those who fear him lack nothing.
10 The lions may grow weak and hungry,
but those who seek the LORD lack no good thing.

God Himself is teaching those who have ears on fearing the Lord:
34 11 Come, my children, listen to me;
I will teach you the fear of the LORD.
13 keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking lies.
14 Turn from evil and do good;seek peace and pursue it.

James 3 on tongue came to me:
James 3 9With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse (judge) men, who have been made in God's likeness. 10Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be.

Fearing God is about the words came out of our mouth. What comes out of our mouth indicates the condition of our heart. Fearing God is to humble our heart and to be low and view others as better than ourselves. Once this heart condition is anchored, it is natural not to judge others who are created in God’s image. Fearing God is to turn away from evil and do good, because there is no evil in Him. Fearing God is to seek peace and pursue it. The true peace is from Jesus who is the prince of peace. Fearing God is to identify with Our Creator in heart, in action and in motives.

Application to me: I have learnt to guard my mouth from gossip, a lesson that I learnt with great price couple of years ago. But, do I judge? Some times. Do I always seek peace when I speak or act? Much prayer is needed and it is not a day or week. It is going to take some time. Thank you, Lord for your revelation and knowledge - these are pure like Gold to my soul.

Bridal Fast - Day 5 (Feb. 22, 2010)

2010-02-22T16:49:00.000-08:00

Bridal Fast – Day 5 (Feb. 22, 2010)

The Bible verses jumped out to me are Exodus 34:28 and Matthew 4:1-2. Moses fasted for 40 days and 40 nights without eating bread or drinking water. He was in the Lord’s presence for 40 days and 40 nights. Jesus fasted 40 days and 40 nights. According to my husband who knows medical facts well, a person can live without water for only 7 days. So what Moses and Jesus went through were miracles in human’s eyes.

Exodus 34
28 Moses was there with the LORD forty days and forty nights without eating bread or drinking water. And he wrote on the tablets the words of the covenant—the Ten Commandments.

Matthew 4 1Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the desert to be tempted by the devil. 2After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry.

I have regular appointments with a trainer for exercise 3 times a week. I cancelled last Friday’s training in order to preserve energy.

Psalm says that God is our strength. I prayed that God gave me strength for today’s training session. Praise God, He heard and answered – not only I finished the 30 minutes training, but also it was done with greater weight, plus another 30 minutes Elliptical exercise.

I had a dream today. For the 1st time, I dreamed about God. I am a dreamer, and almost dream every night, but it is the first time that I dream about God. The dream seems to be very short – maximum of 2 minutes. I went to sleep praising Him, suddenly, overwhelming joy and fear of knowing that He is ever present and He is with me always, at all times. It is revelation beyond mental knowledge. I said to myself – He is right here! I was in a private place, behind a door (a door like public bathroom room). He showed me a sign – A Cross appear on the door (a door made of wood and painted in white), and it is a cross with flaming blue and purple fire. Very soon (less than 2 second) the cross disappeared. I was so excited to see the sign and joyfully confident that He is right here with me! When I woke up, it was exactly one hour from the time I went to sleep. In His presence, the time passes so fast!

The time at the prayer room was so intimate – He spoke to me: I am pleased with your determination, I am worthy of your relentless pursuit!

Hearing what God says of me is so encouraging. There is no one says as God says, there is no one love us like God loves. I came to realize that we will not need to seek attention or praise from others if we hear what He sees and says of us, because we are secure in Him.

Bridal Fast - Day 2

2010-02-20T11:51:00.000-08:00

Day 2 is much easier in terms of feeling hungry. I am hearing from God 'do not seek the glory from man. It is between me and you'. I remembered Matthew 6

Matthew 6 Fasting;
16"Whenever you fast, do not put on a gloomy face as the hypocrites do, for they neglect their appearance so that they will be noticed by men when they are fasting Truly I say to you, they have their reward in full. 17"But you, when you fast, anoint your head and wash your face 18so that your fasting will not be noticed by men, but by your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you.

This is good reminder on motives of fasting. I pray that God keeps my motive in check.

Today, I found a prayer room near my daughter's school by surprise. While waiting to pick her up, I am so delighted to spend 1 hour in this quiet place meeting with my Lord. Here, I took a communion in remembering His body and blood. God showed me a picture where He picked me (a little girl) and tossed me up and down and pick me up when I fell down. I heard laughter. We are having a lot of fun. When I survey the ground as I fell downwards, I thought to myself: He is always there to pick me up, so I have nothing to be afraid of. Immediately, I start to fly fearlessly!

Today's Bible reading became my prayer to the Lord:

Psalm 27 4 One thing I have asked from the LORD, that I shall seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life,
To behold the [a]beauty of the LORD
And to meditate in His temple.
5 For in the day of trouble He will conceal me in His tabernacle;
In the secret place of His tent He will hide me;
He will lift me up on a rock.
6 And now my head will be lifted up above my enemies around me,
And I will offer in His tent sacrifices with shouts of joy;
I will sing, yes, I will sing praises to the LORD.

A shout of Joy is our sacrifice to the Lord!

Bridal Fast Day 1 - Continued

2010-02-20T09:45:00.001-08:00

My day one ends in raised voices and somewhat edgy mood. My husband asked me what the matter was. I told him - I am fasting and had not had food for 9 hours. My stomach starts to growl when I start to prepare for dinner.

Isaiah 58 keeps coming into my mind:

True Fasting

4 Your fasting ends in quarreling and strife,
and in striking each other with wicked fists.
You cannot fast as you do today
and expect your voice to be heard on high.
5 Is this the kind of fast I have chosen,
only a day for a man to humble himself?
Is it only for bowing one's head like a reed
and for lying on sackcloth and ashes?
Is that what you call a fast,
a day acceptable to the LORD ?
6 "Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:
to loose the chains of injustice
and untie the cords of the yoke,
to set the oppressed free
and break every yoke?
Note: The prayers during fasting that will ascend to heaven are the prayers to loose the chains of injustice, untie the cords of the yoke to set the oppressed free.

7 Is it not to share your food with the hungry
and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—
when you see the naked, to clothe him,
and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?
Note: Lord, we have not stop giving to the hungry, to those who devote their lives to your kingdom.

8 Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness [a] will go before you,
and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.
Note: thank you for your wonderful promises: healing comes, righteousness shine before me and the glory of God be my rear guard.

9 Then you will call, and the LORD will answer;
you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.
"If you do away with the yoke of oppression,
with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
Note: God will answer when we get rid of yoke of oppression, blaming, and gossip. What is oppressing me? What am I complaining about? Tonight, my heart is burdened with some warning notes from school regarding my daughter's reading. It is not that she is not smart enough to do it very well. It is that attitude of irresponsibility (late in turning homework, forget items..) really bothers me. Is it because we as parents too responsible in reminding her cause her to relinquish her responsibility? Am I overacting? I carried the burden of training up our child in the ways of the Lord. It is becoming too heavy that I am losing the joy. Oh, Lord, I have to lay it at your feet and have to let go of my burden.

10 and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry
and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness,
and your night will become like the noonday.
11 The LORD will guide you always;
he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
like a spring whose waters never fail.
Note: what precious promises of His provision when we choose to give.

12 Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins
and will raise up the age-old foundations;
you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls,
Restorer of Streets with Dwellings.
Note: thank you for calling me Repairer of Broken Walls, Restorer of Streets with Dwellings.

13 "If you keep your feet from breaking the Sabbath
and from doing as you please on my holy day,
if you call the Sabbath a delight
and the LORD's holy day honorable,
and if you honor it by not going your own way
and not doing as you please or speaking idle words,
Note: I have to confess that I have not consistently honor His Day and have not always delighted myself in the Sabbath.

14 then you will find your joy in the LORD,
and I will cause you to ride on the heights of the land
and to feast on the inheritance of your father Jacob."
The mouth of the LORD has spoken.
Note: Joy! That is what I want and what my heart desire! The outcome of True Fasting is Joy! The True Fasting is heart change resulting relinquish of our own ways, giving, praying to break free the bondage of oppressions, running away from complaining and gossip, and delighting in His Sabbath.

Bridal Fast Day 1

2010-02-18T09:48:00.000-08:00

Bridal Fast Day 1

I desire a fasting and prayer lifestyle – the conviction came from last year ONE THING Conference in Mesa. It seems that working around house and taking care of my family took a lot of time. I tend to make a list of ‘to do’s and feel very accomplished when everything in this ‘to do’ list is checked. Often times, I will lose the peace, especially when I need to run around meeting time lines. I read His words daily and have hugely benefited from His words. However, spending time with Jesus has not become the greatest priority. Holy Spirit has been prompting me for a while on fasting, sorry it has been put in back burner. A friend of mine is starting 21 day Daniel diet to hear more from God. I wanted to set the same time period for fasting as well. After much prayer, I decided to fast one meal per day for next 21 days. I will use the ‘no meal’ time to wait upon Him, to praise Him, to pray to Him, so I can truly sing ‘I am yours and you are mine’ (Song of Songs 2:16).

I did a GOOGLE search on Ancient Jewish Wedding with 12 steps, and found Jewish customs on bridal fast. This is the title of my fast, the bridal fast.

http://www.opendoorministrieswv.org/ancientjewishwedding.html

Step Seven: Mikvah

Brides in ancient Israel, as well as brides in Israel today, experience a mikvah prior to her wedding. The word ‘mikvah’ means a pool of living water which was used for ritual purification. This immersion in water is part of their physical and spiritual preparation for the wedding ceremony. The mikvah represents a separation from the old life to a new life.

Mark 16:16 reads, “He who believes and is baptized (goes to the mikvah) will be saved; but he who does not believe, will be condemned.”

The Bride of Christ also goes to the living waters of the mikvah. When we, as believers in Yeshua (Jesus), are immersed in water (Holy Spirit), it is a separation from an old life to a new life. “Old things pass away, all things become new.”

Step Eight: Departure of the Groom

John 14:2: “I go to prepare a place for you.”

Once the marriage covenant was sealed, the bridegroom left his bride to go to his father’s house to prepare a wedding chamber. He would be gone for up to twelve
months.

In John 14:2-3, Jesus said “In My Father’s house are many mansions. If it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you, and if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to myself; that where I am, there you may be also.”

Our Bridegroom has gone to prepare a wedding chamber for His bride.

In Matthew 9:15, Jesus said, “Can the friends of the Bridegroom mourn as long as the
Bridegroom is with them? But the days will come when the Bridegroom will be taken away from them, and then they will fast.”

While we wait for the return of our Bridegroom/King, we need to stay faithful, watchful and spiritually alert. This is the hour to pray and fast!

1 Peter 4:7 says, "But the end of all things is at hand; therefore, be serious and watchful in your prayers."

Step Nine: The Consecrated Bride

The Jewish bride was set apart, consecrated, separated unto her bridegroom — the one
who purchased her. So, while waiting for his return, she was to stay faithful. It was probably easy at first. But when his return was delayed, the temptation would be great. After a while, the bride may even start to question his return.

2 Peter 3:3,4 reads: "Scoffers will come in the last days, walking according to their own lusts, and saying, 'Where is the promise of His coming?'”

We are His consecrated bride, awaiting His return. We cannot fall into temptation. We must be ready at all times for the return of our Bridegroom/King!

Dear friends, please say a prayer for me when you read this blog, so this fast will be fruitful and God intended purpose can be accomplished – to set apart as the bride of Christ.

In and Out of Brazil within a day

2009-12-17T11:49:00.000-08:00

Getting a visa to travel is not that easy and it is costly these days, even with a US passport. Many countries apply Reciprocal diplomatic policy: Country A charge people in Country B $150 for a tourist visa of 6 month, the Country B will charge the same $150 for the Country A to get a tourist visa of 6 month. I got my 5-year visa to Brazil in June. However, we could not go due to trip conflict with another trip and increased concern regarding N1H1. We decided to postpone Brazil trip to December. We can tag along my husband's business trip and have a weekend family time at Rio, Coppercabaña, one of most beautiful white sand beach in the world. Also, more importantly, we can visit my daughter's grandparents and other relatives in Sao Paulo.

I have been to Sao Paulo and Rio few years back while I was working. I was not that much impressed with this country, for the reasons of lack of safety, the summer weather is very hot and humid, things are very expensive, and I do not know the language. My dear husband determined to convince me that Brazil is a great country, it is a place where he spent his teenage years, and it shaped him to be a multi-language Latin-Chinese. The bountiful supply of tropical fruits is mouth watering when he describes, and of course the abundant supply of beef everywhere. Plus, Brazil has becoming one of the largest mission sending country.

After total of 19 hours of flight, and layovers, we arrived Sao Paulo around 7:00 am local time. To our surprise, the immigration officer asked us to sit outside and wait for further instruction. My husband translated the conversation; my 5-year visa that was granted in June is invalid because I did not travel within 1st 90 days of visa issue date. So, I cannot enter Brazil. But, I am in Brazil! We were given instruction to contact the US embassy in Brazil and ask for a waiver so I can stay here for 7 days. Only an hour late, another officer came and told us that the option was not available anymore. We were moved to American Airline Admiral lunge. I wish that American Airline would check this out before we boarded the plain! Three of us joined hands to pray continuously for open doors. My husband contacted all possible leads that could help the situation: his office in Brazil, Brazil government officials, and US Embassy consulate. Around 4 pm, the outcome became clear: US embassy consulate refuses to issue request for a 'waiver' due to 'political' reasons. Another person who was held up gained his freedom at 4:00 pm, because his father is a US diplomat in Brazil. We later learn that this kind of things happen more frequent lately due to ‘Reciprocal’ treatment between the two countries.

We made a very difficult decision: send my daughter to her grandparents for 3 days, and my husband will join her to return to the US. I will fly back to the US on very next available flight, which is 11:45 pm on the same day. Tears streamed down my face knowing that I had to be separated from my family for few days, and had to fly back all by myself. My daughter wanted to come with me initially. But, I know how much her grandparents miss her; they have not seen her for 2 years. So, it is best for her to spend few days with our relatives in Brazil.

While we were waiting outside of ‘immigration’, a young girl who sits there all by herself asked us if we speak Chinese. I learned that she was refused to pick up her luggage from one airline to another for her transit through Brazil, as Brazil officer insisted that she needs a visa for taking out the luggage. The Spirit in me reminded me to pray for her. So I asked my daughter to join my hands with her and prayed for her for God’s blessings onto her, and she is able to fly to home safely, and for her to know the Lord Jesus. Her face was very red when we finished the prayer. She told me that many of her school classmates were believers. Then Brazilian officers separated us. Maybe, this is the encounter that I am here for? I pray that she will know one, and only savior.

We learnt a valuable lesson: we need to ensure travel within the 90 days of visa issue date. God is good all the time. He is worthy all of our praises. He has plans to prosper us, not to harm us. He allows us to be benefitted from an unpleasant circumstance because we love Him. We thanked God for providing us a place to stay to go through this ordeal, and a comfortable lunge with food and drinks. One corner became our family corner with a phone dedicated to our use. We are so thankful that so many people from my husband company made time to call to help.

Psalm 103
1 Praise the LORD, O my soul;
all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
2 Praise the LORD, O my soul,
and forget not all his benefits-
3 who forgives all your sins
and heals all your diseases,
4 who redeems your life from the pit
and crowns you with love and compassion,
5 who satisfies your desires with good things
so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.
6 The LORD works righteousness
and justice for all the oppressed.
7 He made known his ways to Moses,
his deeds to the people of Israel:
8 The LORD is compassionate and gracious,
slow to anger, abounding in love.
9 He will not always accuse,
nor will he harbor his anger forever;
10 he does not treat us as our sins deserve
or repay us according to our iniquities.
11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his love for those who fear him;
12 as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
13 As a father has compassion on his children,
so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;

Forgiveness

2009-11-29T21:03:00.000-08:00

This post should be done in early November.

Recently, I just had the burden in my heart to step out of my fear and ask for forgiveness of formal church co-worker. God confirmed it with Luke 6:27-28, “But I say to you who hear: love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, and pray for those who spitefully use you”. I initiated few attempts of reconciliation in the past and these were rejected. I dread of facing another rejection. But the nudge for reconciliation has persisted for a long time. I have prayed for this person and for the reconciliation for a very long time (more than 1 year). To me, it is more difficult to ask for forgiveness than to command legs to grow in His name.

Luke 6:27-28 was the Bible verse to memorize during the last week's 4th grade Sunday school. I asked the kids in the class to apply the words in our daily life; I know that I need to do the same.

It was a Thursday, I dialed #, the other side picked up after few rings. My heart was racing. My husband was praying sitting next to me. His presence gave me a lot of encouragement. Right now, I am blessed with ‘two is better than one’. After brief exchange of greetings, I went to ask for forgiveness on my previous wrong doings that hurt this person. To my surprise, this person stated that past has been forgotten and has moved on with new ministry. I knew in my spirit that forgiveness has not occurred in this person’s heart. But, it is a very good start to verbally confess it. Forgiveness is a process. It takes time from recognizing the need to ask for forgiveness to taking the courage to do it. God has worked in my heart through this process, from anger, bitter, dreams, prayer, waiting, … and slowly, I start to see this person in the ways that God sees. 'Oh, I should not have been so direct with my words before'. Sometimes, the fear of rejection is overwhelming, then, Holy Spirit would remind me, what do you want it to be when you face Jesus right now? Still hold grudges against some parts of His body? I hear from Jesus, 'my child, you have not forgiving, there is a visible spot in your bridal garment.' What else to say, God, I want my wedding garment to be white and pure white without any blemish.

Next week, I can boldly and confidently tell the 4th graders: “I did it”. It is a such good feeling for being free!

New Beginning Festival in Sedona

2009-09-26T14:18:00.000-07:00

We drove to Sedona for a new beginning festival on Sept. 18. Along the way, there were all kinds of festivals going on: Celtic festival, spirit Yoga and new age festivals. In this absolute beautiful place, God's creation reflects His Majesty and glory. Along the main road, there are many new age healing room, prayer rooms, and psychic places. The location of the new beginning festival is in open tent and it is on top of the mountain close to Sedona airport, where we oversee the entire city.

One of speaker of this conference specialize seasonal and geographical portal, spiritual places on earth. We have also heard that new age people like to visit Sedona because of vortex, connecting to high power and spiritual experience. As a christian, I came to Sedona for outdoor activities and tried to get away from all the new age stuff. God is reclaiming this beautiful place to be His, in this place where many other spirits are exalted, the highest power of universe is to be worshipped.

The worship led by Harvest Rock church was wonderful, the presence of the Lord is so strong. Whenever I am touched by the Holy Spirit, I would cry. The tears run down my chicks continuously. Looking up the cross, my heart saying, Lord, all of me are yours, my soul, my spirit, and my body. My God is majestic King, He reigns in this place.

One of our favorite pastors from Redding California spoke on 9/18 night. The message is great reminder for beholding the presence of God wherever we go. I love the parable he used: Holy Spirit is like dove, very sensitive and delicate, image how we would walk, talk, and act if a dove is sitting on our shoulder. It is the same way when we possess the presence of Holy Spirit, guard our heart, our mind and our talk for Holy Spirit to dwell in us. Holy Spirit empower us to walk out the life that God called us. Luke 9: 1-3 When Jesus had called the Twelve together, he gave them power and authority to drive out all demons and to cure diseases, and he sent them out to preach the kingdom of God and to heal the sick.

After a wonderful message, the pastor started to call out all kind of sickness. I stood up when he called on back pain or back problem. My foot grew in the beginning of year at a team prayer meeting, my back pain is significantly reduced since then. Just recently, it started to hurt bit more. A lady whom I did not know came over, and asked me, "can I pray for you and your legs might not be even". I replied 'yes' immediately. Then several others who sit nearby also started to pray, my left foot is slightly shorter than my right foot, my left foot started to grew when she prayed for it. God did it again and my leg grew! I was so excited! So many sickness have been called and many people raised their hands to praise God for healing their sickness and many came to stage to testify. One guy has chronic fatigue and can barely stand, walk, even sit for a long time. He jumped out of seat and run to the stage to praise God for he is healed from this muscle atrophy and he has so much strength to run around. What a glorious night to give God the glory in this 'spiritual place'.

Next day, we had another exciting service! The presence of God was ushered in with praise and worship, and many blows the Trumpet as it is Rosh HaShanah. Rosh HaShanah, Jewish new year beginning and that is why this festival is call 'new beginning festival'. Healing started to take place and strange things started to happen, gold teeth started to appear in people's mouth. A 80 + lady went to stage and opened her mouth wide and showed everyone her gold teeth. Gold crowned teeth on both sides of teeth - impeccable dental work, only from Almighty God. But why, gold teeth? I do not know, God must have sense of humor. A young African American woman came to stage to testify instant weight loss, her weight loss started from the last week (at the same conference in Las Vegas) and God told her to come to Sedona to testify. She looks like that she weighs 150 lbs, what a miracle to lose 50 lbs instantly.

The service ended about 4:00 pm. My husband went to ask for this lady's prayer on weight loss. Usually, when we are healed of certain sickness or disease, we are given the anointing to pray for others. We (both my husband and I) had our legs grew in January with symptom of back pain. The people whom we prayed for also had their legs grew when we prayed for them. As we shared with this lady and two of her friends on what God has done, she asked us to pray for her as she has server back pain. We prayed and her leg grew, two of her friends also asked for prayer, we practiced team prayer, and each time, the legs grew. We were so excited and gave God the glory. Another man came by, he was stern face and came over and said, I have bad back, bad neck and I could use some prayer. His leg grew too. His face is still clouded with sadness and depression. His face started to shine after my husband asked all of us and this man to praise God. Slowly, he started to smile.

We looked at the time, it is 6:30 pm! Praise God, we got to minister to others as soon as we received his blessings.

Physically, we were tired, we would not trade this couple of day with anything else.

Don't Take Yourself Too Seriously by R.T. Kendall

2009-09-22T14:48:00.000-07:00

I just have to post this article by R.T. Kandall. So often, I am taking myself too seriously.

Don't Take Yourself Too Seriously by R.T. Kendall
Monday, 14 September 2009 12:00 AM EDT

He replied, "I have been very zealous for the Lord God Almighty. The Israelites have rejected your covenant, broken down your altars, and put your prophets to death with the sword. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me too." —1 Kings 19:10

One of my greatest fears is that God will pass me by because I might take myself too seriously if He gave me a greater anointing. Taking oneself too seriously is assuming one is more important than he or she really is. It results in our expecting more respect and attention than is warranted. We begin feeling that we, more than anyone else, should be notified the moment God has new plans for His church—and, of course, these plans should include us.

Even when we are seeking to walk in obedience to the Lord there is a danger of taking ourselves too seriously. We may fall prey to the "Elijah complex." Elijah's finest hour was followed by his taking himself very seriously. "I am the only one left," he said, having earlier lamented he was no better than his ancestors.

The twin sins of self-righteousness and self-pity so readily lift their ugly heads at us. For example, it is a rare person who can be an intercessor in prayer and not boast about it. It is a rare person who can pray for a leader and then refrain from giving advice. It is a rare person who can be greatly used of God today and tomorrow be quietly willing to watch God use another. It is a rare person who can see God answer prayer on one item and not question because He doesn't answer other prayers. It is a rare person who can enjoy sweet intimacy with Christ today and not feel sad when He doesn't manifest His presence tomorrow.

Few of us can handle much success, especially in the area of knowing God. God is the only one who can deal with us when we are like that. Sometimes the only way He can get our attention is by being ruthlessly silent. Don't fear His silence. Use it to examine your heart and motives. Listen expectantly for the silence to be broken by the glory of His manifested presence once again in your life.

Believer's Identity

2009-09-04T17:17:00.000-07:00

My identity as a child of God is revealed in the promise of the Word of God. I am who God ells me I am. I have what God tells me I have. I can do what God tells me I can do (Eph. 1:17-19). The word of God is a spiritual mirror that tells me who I truly am as I look into it.(James 1:21-25: 2Cor. 3:18)

I am redeemed - forgiven of all my sin and restored to a relationship with God by the blood of Jesus (Eph. 1:7; Col. 1:7; Ps. 103:3)

I am justified - God has imputed righteousness to me because of Jesus. (Just as if I have never sinned.) (2 Cor. 5:21; Rom. 5:1; 8:30)

I am loved - nothing in this world can separate me from God's love. (Rom. 8:35-39; Eph. 3:18-20; Jer. 31:3)

I am blessed, not cursed - Christ has redeemed me from the curse. (Eph. 1:3; Gal. 3:13-14: Deut. 28:1-14)

I am highly favored - my Heavenly Father has lavished His favor on all of my life. (Ps. 5:12; Luke 1:28, 30; Luke 2:52)

I am adopted into God's family - the spirit of sonship (adoption) is now within me worshipping God. (Eph.1:4-6; Rom. 8:15-17; Gal. 4:5-7)

I am healed by the stripes of Jesus. I am delivered by the blood of Jesus. I have the mind of Christ. (1 Peter 2:24; Psalm 107:20; Isa. 53:5; Col.1:13; Ps 107-1-2; Rev. 12:11; 1 Cor. 2:16; Rom 12:1-2; Col. 3:1-3)

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Greater is He who is in me than he who is in the world. (Ph. 4:12; Mark 9:23; 1 John 4:4; John 16:23)

I am filled, loved, and empowered by the Holy Spirit (John 14:26; Acts 1:8; Rom. 8:14)

In Jesus name no weapon formed against me will prosper - I've been given authority over Satan's weapons and works. ( Isa 54:17; Luke 10:18-19)

I hear God's voice and am submitted and obedient to His word. (John 10:27; Ps. 23:1-6)

I am a king and priest to God. (Rev.1:5-6, 1 Peter 2:9)

I am a new creation in Christ Jesus, old things are passed away and all things are brand new. (2 Cor. 5:17; Titus 3:5)

I am filled with the fruit of the Holy Spirit - God's love, joy peace, kindness, meekness, goodness, faithfulness, patience, and self control (Gal. 5:22-25; 1 Cor. 13:1-13)

Source: Church for the Nations

PB&J and Proverbs 3

2009-09-03T12:31:00.000-07:00

This morning, we all got up earlier to go to school earlier. We had tardies last two days. My daughter even had time to eat her favorite PB&J, while I am reading the Bible. Our breakfast has moved from dining table to car soon after the school started. I have read Proverbs 3 many times, and God speaks to my heart with new light and truth.
Proverbs (Message Bible)
5-12 Trust God from the bottom of your heart;
don't try to figure out everything on your own.
Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go;
he's the one who will keep you on track.
Don't assume that you know it all.
Run to God! Run from evil!
Your body will glow with health,
your very bones will vibrate with life!
Honor God with everything you own;
give him the first and the best.
Your barns will burst,
your wine vats will brim over.

I love the plain language from the Message Bible! Trusting God with all your heart, is ambiguous sometimes, when to turn to God, and for what do I turn to God? A lot of times, we turn to God in desperation, or exhaustion of our own efforts. The small matters that I can handle and I just do it, and I only turn to God when I encounter difficulties. Here the Bible says that "don't try to figure out everything on your own. Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; he's the one who will keep you on track. Don't assume that you know it all. Run to God! Run from evil!" What struck me the most is the absolute word of 'everything', listen for God's voice in everything we do, everywhere we go. Oh, God, forgiving me for not trusting you 100%. I asked God to help me to be sensitive to Holy Spirit and help me to be obedient to prompt of Holy Spirit in His guidance in everything I do and everywhere I go.

Next paragraph is very interesting. The benefit of holding fast sound wisdom and discernment is physical! Beside safe travel, sound nap and sleep, In NIV Bible, it says that "21 My son, preserve sound judgment and discernment, do not let them out of your sight; 22 they will be life for you, an ornament to grace your neck." In New Living Translation, it says that "21 My child, don’t lose sight of common sense and discernment.Hang on to them, 22 for they will refresh your soul. They are like jewels on a necklace." In Message Bible, it says, "21-26 Dear friend, guard Clear Thinking and Common Sense with your life; don't for a minute lose sight of them. They'll keep your soul alive and well, they'll keep you fit and attractive. Hey, ladies, including myself, the way to fit and attractive is to hang on to the wisdom from the Lord, in which a sound judgement and discernment are from. Trusting in God with all of our heart, and hear and follow His voice in life journey will certainly produce a very confident woman, who has no fear, no worry. Confident woman is extremely attractive. The world knows it.

The third revelation of Proverbs 3 is verses "27-29 Never walk away from someone who deserves help; your hand is God's hand for that person." WOW, I did not know that our helping hand is God's hand for the person who is seeking help from me. Almighty God blesses his people with our helping hands. What a privilege to co-work with Him.

We got to school 15 minutes earlier and my daughter went on swing before the bell rang. She is a happy kid!

What a wonderful day in the Lord, when it started with His words.

Power of Modeling

2009-08-26T22:43:00.000-07:00

On my way to school, my daughter told me that she tricked her friend to eat all of her lunch. "She is smaller than me although she is older than me", my daughter was describing her friend to me. Mama, I had a sugar cookie, and I ate half. I asked if my friend wanted the rest of cookie. She said 'yes'. I told her to finish all her food before she can have the cookie. She ate all of her lunch and I gave her the cookie. My friend always throws the bread away because she does not like the bread.

I could not help myself to laugh; my daughter has learnt well from her own mama and applied it very effectively. Very often, my daughter is eating very slow and picky. We (my husband and I) know that she loves sweets and she always has room for sweets. We tell her often that she can have ice cream or chocolate or some other type of dessert if she finishes all the food in her plate. This has worked really well for my daughter to have well balance meal - well beside the sweets.

I realize the power of modeling as a parent. My daughter is applying how she is treated to others. As a parent, I better be watching my thought and my actions.

2 King 4: 8-36 The Shunammite's Son Restored to Life

2009-08-25T13:40:00.000-07:00

When Shunammite woman showed kindness and provided lodging place for the man of God, Elisha. Elisha wanted to do something for her, even without her asking for it. He prophesied '16 "About this time next year," Elisha said, "you will hold a son in your arms." Despite her disbelief, she became pregnant.

The Shunammite woman and her husband of old age must be overjoyed with a son. However, he died in his young age in his father's field. How can this be? No wonder the Shunmmite woman let out of bitterness to Elisha "Didn't I tell you, 'Don't raise my hopes'?" Great disappointment follow after the great joy. The higher the expectation, the greater the pain it is with the fall or failure.

Resurrection effort started with Elisha's staff that his servant Gehazi carried ahead of him. However, the boy was not revived. Later, I learn that Gehazi is not 100% obedient to the command of his master and received just judgement. The heart condition has everything to do 'miracle'.

What Elisha did to resurrect boy is similar to modern day CPR - mouth to mouth, in addition with eye to eye, and hand to hand. The important to know that he prayed to God before doing anything. The boy start to sneeze after twice of this CPR like exercise. He sneeze 7 times, means that revival to life is complete.

Shunmmite woman not only had her son restored, but her faith in almighty God.

Applications:

Learn from the Shunmmite woman and show extraordinary hospitality to the man of God, i.e. God's servant, pastors, and christians. and to do what's not being asked.

God is good and give to the righteous what they don't dare to ask and beyond what their eyes can see.

Do you want to live a life that flows with miracles? We can learn a lot from this Shunmmite woman. She fears God, and she honor and respect the man of God. She recognizes that God is source of everything - give life. She did not quit God or the man of God, just because her son died.

Father's Love Letter

2007-04-23T20:43:00.000-07:00

The Cry of a Father’s Heart from Genesis to Revelation.
My Child….
You may not know me, but I know everything about you…Psalm 139:1 I know when you sit down and when you rise up…Psalm 139:2 I am familiar with all your ways …Psalm 139:3 Even the very hairs on your head are numbered…Matthew 10:29-31 For you were made in my image…Genesis 1:27 In me you live and move and have your being…Acts 17:28 For you are my offspring…Acts 17:28 I knew you even before you were conceived…Jeremiah 1:4-5 I chose you when I planned creation…Ephesians 1:11-12 You were not a mistake…Psalm 139:15-16 For all your days are written in my book…Psalm 139:15-16 I determined the exact time of your birth and where you would live…Acts 17:26 You are fearfully and wonderfully made…Psalm 139:14 I knit you together in your mother’s womb…Psalm 139:13 And brought you forth on the day you were born…Psalm 71:6 I have been misrepresented by those who don’t know me…John 8:41-44 I am not distant and angry, but am the complete expression of love …1 John 4:16 And it is my desire to lavish my love on you..1 John 3:1 Simply because you are my child and I am your Father…1 John 3:1 I offer you more than your earthly father ever could…Matthew 7:11 For I am the perfect Father…Matthew 5:48 Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand…James 1:17 For I am your provider and I meet all your needs…Matthew 6:31-33 My plan for your future has always been filled with hope…Jeremiah 29:11 Because I love you with an everlasting love…Jeremiah 31:3 My thoughts toward you are countless as the sand on the seashore…Psalm 139:17-18 And I rejoice over you with singing…Zephaniah 3:17 I will never stop doing good to you …Jeremiah 32:40 For you are my treasured possession …Exodus 19:5 I desire to establish you with all my heart and all my soul…Jeremiah 32:41 And I want to show you great and marvelous things…Jeremiah 33:3 If you seek me with all your heart, you will find me…Deuteronomy 4:29 Delight in me and I will give you the desires of your heart …Psalm 37:4 For it is I who gave you those desires…Philippians 2:13 I am able to do more for you than you could possibly imagine…Ephesians 3:20 For I am your greatest encourager…2 Thessalonians 2:16-17 I am also the Father who comforts you in all your troubles …2 Corinthians 1:3-4 When you are brokenhearted, I am close to you…Psalm 34:18 As a shepherd carries a lamb, I have carried you close to my heart…Isaiah 40:11 One day I will wipe away every tear from your eyes…Revelation 21:3-4 And I’ll take away all the pain you have suffered on this earth…Revelation 21:4 I am your Father and I love you even as I love my son, Jesus…John 17:23 For in Jesus my love for you is revealed …John 17:26 He is the exact representation of my being…Hebrews 1:3 And He came to demonstrate that I am for you, not against you…Romans 8:31 And to tell you that I am not counting your sins…2 Corinthians 5:18-19 Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled…2 Corinthians 5:18-19 His death was the ultimate expression of my love for you…1 John 4:10 I gave up everything I loved that I might gain your love…Romans 8:32 If you receive the gift of my son Jesus, you receive me…1 John 2:23 And nothing will ever separate you from my love again…Romans 8:38-39 Come home and I’ll throw the biggest party heaven has ever seen…Luke 15:7 I have always been Father and will always be Father…Ephesians 3:14-15 My question is...Will you be my child?…John 1:12-13 I am waiting for you…Luke 15:11-32
…Love, Your Dad
Almighty God
Compiled by Barry Adams Copyright 1999
Visit the interactive website at www.FathersLoveLetter.com